Spokesman:
How many times has this happened to you? You have
a bass, and you're trying to find an exciting new way to prepare it for
the dinner table. You could scale the bass, remove the bass' tail, head
and bones, and serve the fish as you would any other fish dinner. But
why bother, now that you can use Rovco's amazing new kitchen tool, the
Super Bass-o-Matic '76. Yes, fish-eaters, the days of troublesome
scaling, cutting and gutting are over, because Super Bass-o-Matic '76 is
the tool that lets you use the bass with no fish waste, and without
scaling, cutting or gutting.
Here's
how it works: Catch a bass, remove the hook, and drop the bass - that's the
whole bass - into the Super Bass-o-Matic '76. [drops
the bass into the blender ] Now, adjust the control dial so that the bass
is blended just the way you like it. [turns blender on and
grinds it to a pulp ] Yes, it's that simple!
Bass-Drinker:
[drinks a glassful of bass ] Wow, that's terrific bass!

Spokesman: We've got fish here, fast and easy and ready to
pour, mmm-mmm! Super Bass-o-Matic '76 comes with ten interchangeable
rotors, a nine-month guarantee, and a booklet: 1,001 Ways to Harness
Bass. Super Bass-o-Matic '76 works great on sunfish, perch, sole,
and other small aquatic creatures. [blends one of each ]
Super Bass-o-Matic '76 - it's clean, simple, and after five or ten
fish, it gets to be quite a rush! Super Bass-o-Matic '76 - you'll never
have to scale, cut or gut again!