Martha Stewart: Topless Christmas Special
(December 7, 1996)

Martha Stewart ... Ana Gasteyer

Martha Stewart Voiceover: I'm Martha Stewart. Join me next week, when I'll share some old and new ideas for creating a truly memorable holiday.

Announcer: "Martha Stewart's Home For the Holiday's Topless Christmas Special".

Martha Stewart: [sitting in her living room, topless] Hi there. I'm Martha Stewart. It's my favorite time of year. Sleigh rides, caroling - these are just some of the things that remind us of Christmas.

[cut to Martha in her Work Room]

This is my Work Room, where we'll be making these corn husk garlands. You can make them, too, in just 24 simple steps.

[cut to close-up of Martha sitting in her kitchen]

Also, we'll learn how to make beeswax candles. They really say Yuletide. [camera zooms out to reveal Martha only wearing a dickey] And, I'll show you how to make a festive holiday dickey out of an old turtleneck. I made this one. I really treasure it.

[cut to Martha walking through the woods with two male friends]

Today, we're taking a field trip to my friend Tom Hardwick's Christmas tree farm in the Hudson River Valley. [glances skyward] Oh, look, there's a good one. [they all walk towards it]

[cut to Martha back in her living room]

So, join me, and my special guests, the Westport Boys Choir, for my Christmas special, "Home For the Holidays". Even if you celebrate Chanukah, it'll be a jolly good thing. [Martha stands up and shakes her breasts in front of the boys but behind her black censor box]